Want a Hot Take? Here’s 8 Truths About Spider-Man That You Aren’t Ready to Admit

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Spider-Man is one of Marvel’s most popular heroes, but it seems like everyone has a different opinion on how Spider-Man should be used, including Marvel itself. Peter has gone through lots of changes over the years and his continuity has gotten a bit wonky. Absurd things have happened, like his marriage being removed from continuity or it being revealed that he has a secret sidekick everyone (including fans) forgot.

There have been so many different interpretations of Spider-Man over the years that it’s hard to nail down what’s essential to the character. Sometimes he’s Tony Stark’s protégé and has access to all the wealth in the world, while sometimes he’s so poor he can’t even chase after Doc Ock if he leaves the Queens area of New York. While it’s perfectly fine to play around with a character’s history and see what new things work, there are a few truths about Spider-Man’s character that we should all admit.

8

Spider-Man Doesn’t Need the Spy Parents

Amazing Spider-Man: Annual #5 by Stan Lee, Larry Lieber, Mike Esposito, and Artie Simek

Peter Parker’s parents remained a bit of a mystery for a while in comics. All that was really known was that Peter’s parents weren’t around, and as such, the young boy had to live with his aunt and uncle. It was just another story beat that added to his general angst – a little extra “they’re not my real parents.”And that was fine, it could be a good source of drama and there are plenty of kids in the world who can’t live with their parents for one reason or another. This was a completely fine plot point that didn’t need any expanding on… but Marvel couldn’t resist.

Because nothing can ever be simple in comics, Peter’s parents became world-class CIA agents. Top secret spies who fought terrorism all over the world before dying tragically in service to their country. This extreme backstory and legacy is a bit of a clash with Peter’s down-to-earth origins. Yes, he was bitten by a radioactive spider and given superpowers, but he was also a broke kid from Queens who was trying to do the best with what he had. That’s what made him so relatable, and having super-spy parents diminishes that.

Peter can’t be a regular kid and the son of secret agents – especially when Marvel keeps being tempted to resurrect the Parkers for short bursts of espionage action (including a long-lost sister Peter never knew he had.)

7

Characters Need to Stop Being Dumbed Down for Comedy

Okay… I’m Talking About J. Jonah Jameson

There are a lot of funny characters in Spider-Man’s supporting roster, but they aren’t just funny. They’re fully fleshed-out characters who have depth to them… or at least, that’s how they are in the comics. However, adaptations and even some modern comic stories tend to flatten Spider-Man’s supporting cast, zeroing in on their goofiest behavior and ignoring what makes them feel real. Yes, the Rhino is an unintelligent brute, but he’s also someone who lost his true love, destroying his belief that life can be meaningful. Yes, J. Jonah Jameson is an ogre of a boss, but he’s also a crusader for civil rights and incredibly protective of his staff, even at the cost of his own safety.

One of the great things about Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man movies was how they were able to have Jameson be a ridiculously hilarious character, but also demonstrated that he’s a fundamentally honorable person. When the Green Goblin attacked the Daily Bugle demanding to know who took the pictures of Spider-Man, Jameson lied to protect Peter Parker, risking his own life to do so. 99% of Spidey characters have that kind of depth, but that fact is forgotten way too often.

6

Peter Parker Deserves to Catch a Break for Once

He Doesn’t Need To Be Literally Cursed With Bad Luck

One of the longest-running jokes in Marvel Comics is just how terrible Peter Parker’s luck is. That no matter what happens, a situation will always blow up in his face in a way that destroys his personal life. Peter chooses his superhero life over his personal life again and again. The fundamental example is from Peter’s school days, and Peter repeatedly claiming he ran away or hid when a supervillain appeared so he could fight as Spider-Man. Peter being unable to catch a break is a metaphor for everything he sacrifices to be there for others, but more and more, Marvel treats it as an actual curse that stops him being happy.

No, really – Jonathan Hickman and Marco Checchetto’s ‘You Get It’ from Amazing Fantasy #1000 has Spidey confront his multiversal variants, only to learn they’re all afflicted with bad luck, doomed to suffer for their entire lives as if it’s some kind of natural law.

While Spider-Man is defined by being beaten and bruised, always paying the price for his heroism, he doesn’t need to be constantly miserable and alone for that message to come across. Spider-Man is an inherently fun character – a wise-cracking hero who swings between New York’s skyscrapers. Joy is a big part of the Spidey brand, and turning him into the most miserable man alive gets boring fast.

5

The Clone Saga Was Worth it for Ben Reilly

Web of Spider-Man #117 by Terry Kavanagh, Steven Butler, Randy Emberlin, Kevin Tinsley, and Steve Dutro

The Clone Saga is one of the most disliked stories in Spider-Man history. While it’s not quite as despised as One More Day, it certainly has its problems. What was meant to just be a simple storyline ended up stretching over the span of several years, causing fatigue for both fans and creatives. The Clone Saga had a lot of bad with it – an incredibly bloated storyline is one of the biggest issues – but not everything that came out of the Clone Saga was objectively terrible. While some fans would love to forget the saga ever happened, that’d be leaving behind a fantastic character.

The Clone Saga did one thing right in giving readers the character of Ben Reilly. Giving Spider-Man essentially a new brother was a fantastic story beat, and while Ben hasn’t been used to his best by Marvel, he’s still an amazing character. Ben is someone with all the drive and responsibility of Peter Parker, but none of the history that shaped him. Ben has all of Peter’s memories, and he knows what it feels like to be loved by Aunt May and Mary Jane, and yet all of that was effectively lost to him at the moment of his creation. He’s Spider-Man without a place in the world, showing how different Peter could become without the people who ground him.

4

Peter Parker Has a Jerky Side, And That’s Okay

Peter Has Never Been Bland, He Was Just Created in the ’60s

One of the things that a lot of adaptations get wrong about Peter Parker is the idea he’s a timid person. A lot of adaptations paint him as someone who wouldn’t hurt a fly and is soft-spoken and tries to avoid attention, but that’s not exactly true. While Peter was definitely a nerd, he was also very angry at the world and at himself. After the death of Uncle Ben, Peter had a lot of rage inside of him, and that’s a fundamental part of his character. It’s what plays into his big theme of responsibility – if he was inherently kind and gentle, he wouldn’t need to keep himself in check.

Peter really wasn’t in high school for that long in the comics, meaning that a lot of adaptations are stuck trying to recreate a 1960s depiction of a young wallflower. Like other aspects of Spider-Man lore, Pete having a relatable, uncool adolescence needs to be updated for the times in which the story is told. The comics depict Pete as a nerdy, snarky guy who often says the wrong thing and sometimes lets his temper get the better of him, rather than the most innocent, hapless teenager in the world.

TV shows and movies like to portray Peter as an inherently innocent and kind person, but when he was a teenager he definitely had a mean streak in him. He was kind of awful during his college years too – indeed, even as an adult, Spider-Man has a habit of rubbing other heroes the wrong way. There’s a reason he wasn’t invited to Wolverine’s birthday party along with every other hero. A lot of adaptations skip how confrontational Spider-Man can be, and therefore sacrifice a lot of the humor the character is capable of generating by sticking his foot in his mouth.

3

Spider-Man Really Didn’t Need The Spider-Totem Lore

Amazing Spider-Man #42 by J. Michael Straczynski, John Romita Jr., Scott Hanna, Dan Kemp, Richard Starkings, and Wes Abbott

One of the things about superhero stories is that nothing can ever be simple. Every nook and cranny of lore ends up being explored at some point, often blown up with incredibly significant new details and ties to iconic stories. For years, Spider-Man was just bitten by a radioactive spider and gained powers. However, in 2002 Marvel embarked on a major reboot. Amazing Spider-Man revealed that Spidey was actually a Spider-Totem – one of many, many Spider-Heroes found across ther multiverse. While this explanation was pretty interesting at the time, it would have been better kept to an alternate universe story and didn’t need to become a fundamental part of the character’s lore.

Spider-Man started out as the friendly neighborhood hero. Someone who was pretty down to earth and dealt with problems that many teenagers deal with in their lives. While it’s well known that it’s the nature of comics to get bigger and more absurd with characters after a while, it still feels like something was lost when Spider-Man was suddenly attached to a multiversal army of heroes. While a lot of cool ideas have come out of the Spider-Verse, they inherently clash with the simple, down-to-earth nature that makes Spider-Man so relatable and iconic.

It Really Doesn’t Work, And Never Has

The Black Suit Saga is one of the greatest parts of Spider-Man’s comic book history. It was so influential it’s even inspired other comic series like Invincible. The problem with it, though, is that a lot of writers don’t seem to get what the black suit was actually about. Originally, it was just a way to free Spider-Man from his responsibility. It allowed him to use his powers freely and much more destructively. That’s why it was exhilarating for Peter: he no longer had to hold back and could just do whatever he felt he needed to do. Of course that wasn’t a responsible use of his powers, and the whole point was that it wasn’t sustainable.

When Peter discovered that the symbiote was a living alien being, he immediately sought to remove it and was better off for having done so. However, a lot of stories that call back to or adapt the Black Suit Saga turn the symbiote into a metaphor for drugs. These stories retrospectively establish that Peter was addicted to the black suit, that it was ruining his life and that – through supreme force of will – he was be able to break free of its influence. Trying to make the symbiote Spider-Man a metaphor for addiction isn’t just shallow, it misses the point of Spider-Man choosing responsibility over raw power.

1

Peter Parker and Mary Jane Should Be Together

Amazing Spider-Man #544-#545, from J. Michael Straczynski, Joe Quesada, Danny Miki, Richard Isanove and Chris Eliopoulos

Mary Jane and Peter Parker belong together, period. They are one of the best romantic couples in comics, and it is honestly baffling that Marvel has spent so many years keeping them apart. While it’s understandable that Marvel wanted to reboot Peter’s social circle for a new era, it’s been almost two decades now, and there are simply no fantastic stories that rely on Peter and Mary Jane being apart.

Every alternate universe where the two characters are together ends up doing extremely well because people love seeing them together – as proved by the recent Ultimate Spider-Man, which sees Peter Parker married with kids. Fans are still vocal about this change a decade later because it took away from the Spider-Man franchise without managing to add anything worthwhile.

Even Marvel knows that Peter and Mary Jane are perfect for each other, repeatedly teasing them getting back together before veering off in a different direction. It makes sense that, with most superheroes, both Marvel and DC want to keep their social life fluid, stopping things growing stale over the decades. However, like Superman and Lois Lane, Spidey and MJ are the exception. Their love is just too fundamental to how the franchise is perceived in pop culture for fans to invest in a different status quo.

Fans like seeing Peter and MJ face hardships together more than they like anything that has come out of their split. Marvel has tried everything, from turning MJ into a superhero to pairing her with new love interest Paul Rabin, and yet as soon as Ultimate Spider-Man brought back the Peter/MJ marriage, the issue sold out three times in two months. Out of all the hard truths about Spider-Man on this list, the biggest is that his marriage to Mary Jane makes the character better.

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