10 Marvel Heroes With the Worst Superpowers (Who Aren’t X-Men)

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The world of Marvel Comics has created hundreds, if not thousands, of unique heroes, covering a spectrum of abilities and powers. Naturally, this means that not every superpower will be amazing or flashy. The simple truth is that some heroes really lose the lottery when it comes to their powers, either getting abilities that are a bit useless or outright dangerous.

This range of powers and abilities is important to the balance of the Marvel Universe. It wouldn’t be nearly so interesting if everyone was ranked at the top; there would be no drama or creativity. So, while these heroes have some of the worst superpowers in Marvel Comics, they help make stories interesting and make the universe feel more real.

10

Blackagar Boltagon Has an Ability That’s Hard to Use

Black Bolt Isn’t Immune from His Destructive Powers

First appeared in Fantastic Four #45 (1965)

Leader & Member of the Inhuman Royal Family

His quasi-sonic scream is lethal

As a member of the Inhumans Royal Family, Black Bolt is usually considered one of the most powerful of his kind. But let’s be real here – Black Bolt did not win the lottery with his ability. Admittedly, Black Bolt has one of the most destructive powers in the Marvel Universe, but that isn’t always a good thing. For example, such power is usually only positive when one is immune to the destruction.

Black Bolt has a few abilities, but his sonic scream is the most iconic. Calling it a scream is a bit misleading, as even a whisper from this hero is enough to cause waves of destruction. He must always be careful with his voice, as even an accidental shout when stubbing a toe could result in the death of loved ones. It isn’t an ideal situation.

9

Squirrel Girl’s Powers Are Fun, But Ridiculous

Doreen Makes the Best of Her Squirrel Abilities

First appeared in Marvel Super-Heroes #8 (1991)

She’s worked with the U.S. Avengers, S.H.I.E.L.D., New Avengers, and Great Lake Avengers

She has a prehensile tail, night vision, and can communicate with squirrels, among other abilities

There’s no denying that Doreen Green, aka Squirrel Girl, is an amazing character. She’s chipper, determined, and shockingly good at using her abilities for good. That said, most children don’t grow up wishing for squirrel superpowers. Squirrel Girl has a few squirrel-themed powers, including enhanced speed, agility, strength, and reflexes. She also has a really strong jaw, so don’t go ticking her off.

Squirrel Girl’s range of powers includes the ability to communicate with squirrels, an ability most people wouldn’t know what to do with, but Doreen has mastered the gift, utilizing her access to a squirrel army on more than one occasion. She can also heal pretty fast, so even when she gets knocked down, readers can rest assured that she’ll get right back up.

Carlton LaFroyge Is a Trickster With Seemingly Pathetic Abilities

First appeared in New Warriors Annual #3 (1993)

Grudgingly accepted into the New Warriors

His “ability” let him see how events should have gone after the fact

Carlton LaFroyge goes down in history for having the worst form of precognition, as his ability lets him know how things could have gone, but only after the fact. They say hindsight is 20/20, and he is the living embodiment of that. Carlton always wanted to be a hero. Specifically, he was desperate to join the New Warriors, so much so that he may have lied a little bit.

The truth is that Hindsight Lad, fooled everyone and has no real abilities. Or rather, his abilities are no different than those of the average reader. Hindsight Lad made up a believable lie to convince the New Warriors to let him join their team. It shouldn’t have worked, but he applied at a time when they were desperate for warm bodies.

7

Eldrac the Door Is a Literal Door

Once an Inhuman, His Transformation Turned Him Into a Door

First appeared in Fantastic Four #577 (2010)

AKA The Doorway, The Door

The Terrigen mist turned him into a living portal

As hard as it may be to believe, Eldrac was once an Inhuman politician. He used to have an important (ish) part in the Inhuman political process, representing a minor faction. However, the political setting changed, and Eldrac’s role was made redundant. This is where his life changed drastically, as his Inhuman nature kicked into overdrive, transforming his character into something new.

During the events of Fantastic Four #577, Eldrac transformed into a giant door. Yes, really. Tucked into the heart of Attilan, Eldrac became the main transport system for all Inhumans, as his mouth served as an interdimensional portal. This earned him the name Eldrac the Door—how appropriate. Eldrac the Door has famously saved many Inhumans, sending them from danger. Unfortunately, he cannot do the same for himself, being stuck to Attilan and all.

6

Mister Immortal’s Resurrection Powers Aren’t As Good As They Could Be

Craig Hollis Can Die, But He’ll Never Stay Dead

First appeared in West Coast Avengers #46 (1989)

Famously part of the Great Lake Avengers

His ability is called retroactive immortality, meaning that while he dies, he can heal (come back) from it

Many people have dreamed of obtaining immortality – it’s one of the reasons why vampire lore is so popular. Unfortunately, Craig Hollis’ story is a harsh reminder that immortality comes in many forms. Also known as Mr. Immortal, Craig is unique in the Marvel Universe. He is Homo Supreme, which is considered to be different from both Homo Sapiens and Homo Superior. He’s also possibly the only one.

Mr. Immortal has the gift of retroactive immortality, which means he can heal from any injury, even death. Yes, this does mean that the character can experience death itself; it just doesn’t stick. Understandably, Mr. Immortal often rises from the dead in an enraged state, as death cannot be a pleasant venture, especially when he wakes up to find himself buried alive.

5

Triton’s Abilities Are Useless On Land

Triton Is a Powerful Fighter in the Water, But Outside of That, He’s in Trouble

First appeared in Fantastic Four #45 (1965)

He’s a member of the Inhuman Royal Family

He has an aquatic physiology

Over the years, comic book fans have enjoyed spending time poking fun at the likes of Aquaman. Now, apply all those jokes to Triton, and it’s easy to understand how this hero got the short end of the stick. Triton is a member of the Inhumans’ Royal Family, and he was fortunate enough to gain access to his abilities at a young age. Unfortunately, his abilities are less than stellar.

Triton is a hero of the ocean. His Inhuman transformation gave him an aquatic physiology, complete with underwater vision. He’s also stronger, faster, and more durable, but only in water. It’s worse than that, as Triton can’t survive outside of water without special devices. As such, he rarely ventured out of the ocean, as it was both difficult and risky.

4

Auran’s Powers Aren’t Very Powerful

Her Inhuman Abilities Enhanced Her Tracking and Detective Skills…and Nothing Else

First appeared in Inhuman #7 (2014)

She served in the New Attilan Security Force

Her ability granted her parabolic hearing

Auran is one of many Inhumans who didn’t gain fantastical powers, similar to many minor mutants from the X-Men. She became a talented detective and trained with ex-cop Frank McGee. Her skills were further enhanced when her Terrigenesis kicked in. This not only changed her appearance but gave her parabolic hearing. In other words, her new large ears actually served a purpose.

Parabolic hearing is admittedly quite helpful for a detective. Unfortunately, this was the only superpower she was granted, and with no special means of defense, she ultimately didn’t survive the harsh events Inhumans are regularly thrown into. Auran’s last act of service to the Inhumans was successfully tracking down the kidnapped Black Bolt, an event that immediately resulted in her death.

3

US Archer’s Powers Feel Fairly Realistic

Ulysses Solomon Archer Can Pick Up Radio Frequencies

First appeared in US #1 (1983)

He’s a truck driver turned hero

Unfortunately, any signal scrambling device will cause him problems

Ulysses Archer, aka US Archer, is one of those heroes whose abilities are so well-grounded that they’re almost believable. Unfortunately, that also means they’re pretty tame, and some might even call them useless. After a horrible accident, part of Ulysses’ head was replaced with a new experimental alloy. In comic book fashion, this experimental treatment gave him access to a new ability.

Now, US Archer has the ability to pick up radio frequencies, essentially making him a human radio. He admittedly can’t access all frequency ranges, and he’s also prone to getting overwhelmed by magnets and other frequency-scrambling devices. Not only does this negate his ability, but it can often incapacitate the hero, making it more of a curse than a gift.

2

Luna Maximoff Isn’t As Powerful As Her Father

Luna Got Her Powers Young Due to Exposure to the Terrigen Mist

First appeared in Fantastic Four #240 (1981)

The daughter of Pietro Maximoff and Crystal

Her aura vision lets her see feeling as a colorful aura

Luna Maximoff is the daughter of Pietro Maximoff and Crystal, the latter of whom is part of the Inhuman Royal Family. As such, it might be tempting to assume Luna is destined for greatness, and maybe she is. Unfortunately, her path in Marvel Comics has been complicated, with many ups and downs. For starters, her father, Pietro, intentionally exposed her to the Terrigen Mists (multiple times) to force out her powers.

Luna’s ability is essentially a form of aura vision, allowing her to see people’s emotions as different colors. In addition to reading emotions this way, she can also manipulate them. Combined with a few other abilities, this has the potential to make her incredibly powerful. Unfortunately, she has trouble controlling her powers, and there’s a small chance she may eventually lose them altogether.

1

J. Pennington Pennypacker’s Powers Are As Worthless As Pennies

Pennypacker Has the Attacking Force of Pennies

J. Penning Pennypacker is a hero introduced during the events of NFL Superpro #10 (1992), and it’s safe to say this issue gets a bit strange. In this issue, a scientist created a fancy machine meant to give people superpowers. Unfortunately, there’s no real way to tell the machine what powers to hand out, so the results are pretty lackluster.

Perhaps the machine took Pennypacker’s name literally, as it gave him the ability to shoot limitless pennies from his wrist. That’s it. He took on the name of Almighty Dollar and joined a ragtag group of heroes called the Happy Campers. Almighty Dollar successfully helped tear down the camp the scientist was using as a cover for his experiments, so that’s a win for this hero.

“}]] With so many heroes in Marvel comics, it is no surprise that some of them lost the superpower lottery, giving them some of the worst superpowers.  Read More